Q.
My fear my phobia, people just dont understand! to most people i know they think its a big joke, But its not , because to me this is my worced fear ever,Doctors and friends have said to me”””. (don’t be a big baby, whats your problem, stop being a wimp just go theirs nothing to be scared of just sit in the chair and relax they wont hurt you) yea rite___ I’ve always had a problem from as far back as i can remember at the age of 12 one summer i was walking past a pub when a loads of people came out of a wine bar fighting i got caught up in it all the next thing i had a pint pot pushed in my face it broke over half of my front tooth i could not let my dad see it because he would have gone mad at me as i should not have been in the town centre at that time , so late at night. I made an appointment myself, i went there on my own, i should never have gone on my own .i was scared i did not want to go, the dentist said that he would put a temp cap on ,he began with some force he poked and proderd in my mouth he said i needed some fillings, then he got a drill out and began to start drilling in my mouth i panicked and pushed him out of the way on to the floor , the nurse talked me in to sitting back down eventually put the cap on but i would not let them use the drill He said i would have to go back for the cap to be done properly, I did not made another appointment as i was so scared i just ran out of there as quick as i could and went home I did not go back at all. After a few months when the cap started getting a bit loose i got some super glue and glued it back in, i did this for a few years, I finally came off when i was about 17 it didnt hurt, and when it did it really hurt when any air got in to it, i had to make an appointment so went to some other dentist in Firth park Sheffield He did the same got the drill out and began to drill into my gum he said it was to get the nerve out i screamed the place down, after some stuggle i got up and punched the nurce, also i hit out at the dentist eventually after a struggle theyd put another temp cap on I did’nt make another appointment, i was in so much pain i just went home and took loads of pain killers. It was a couple of years before i went again, i continued to use superglue untill i had to go again there was one dentist in Sheffield near Hyde park flats. Im sure he was drunk at the time he really hurt me just looking im my mouth, he did’nt do any thing at that time as i asked him not to. even tho he wanted to He made me another appointment, i went but it was’nt the same person when i went back it was some one else he treat me like a piece of meat, and talked to me as if i was a dog or something he dragged my mouth open and really hurt me i just got out of the chair and told him to get his dirty hands of me, never went back i kept on super gluing my teeth back in 1992 i got married to the now x husband, it didÂ’nt last very long five or six weeks he was very violent towards me, he beat and raped me on several occasions he grabbed me by the face and squeezed my cheeks so hard that my back teeth cracked and broke off, Two of my front teeth had cracked off too, as soon as he left the house i searched for some super glue and quickly stuck them back in .when i left him the only way i could get away from him was i got out of the bathroom window because he had locked me in the house, as he often did, I had to save the train fair up by collecting pennies together so i could get the train to Sheffield as i was living in Derbyshire at that time. From then ive some how kept on using superglue to keep my teeth in i had managed tp do this for at least 7/8 years they had croded from the glue and now i was then sticking all 3 front teeth in with super glue they was only just holding together 2 years ago a friend of myn’e has a friend who is a dental nurse she talked me into going to her dentist she said her boss was brilliant and was really good, and that i should not worry. id b okay i trusted her, What a fool i was…… it was a nightmare i couldnt wait inside the waiting room so i said id wait in the car,then when it came to it, it took my friend over an hour to get me out of her car before i would go in to see the dentist, She only wanted to take out my teeth there i couldnt belive it and then i would’nt let her, there’s not any chance that i would let her do it, she took an impression for false teeth, the only reason that i did’nt kick off was because i knew the dental nurse my friend made me the next appointment then brought me back home , a couple of weeks later my friend took me back after the same incident as last time but it was much harder to get me out of the car ,,, I finally i went in and i was given the false teeth on a pallet the dentist try’d to put them in but it looked terrible horrible the teeth on the pallet were nothing like the other ones they were sticking out one more that the others , I looked a right mess and so uncomfortable i could not wear it / them My fears, that i dont want to have false teeth dont want them to be able to come out, I know i would’nt beable to talk properly. and they would fall out, theyre for old people, More so I know that i cant not go backwards and forwards to have treatment to go for pain over and over again and again for years of treatments as my teeth are in bad condtition , i cant bring myself to do this to myself, i would rarther end my life than go through all that. i have been reading up over the internet over the last few years The quickest available treatment are inplants they can be completed in just 3 visits or i saw on the news last year of a treatment with inplants done with lazer surgery that only takes 60 min to complete, this treatment is now avalable but i dont know how or where from I am really embarrassed about the way i look i cant be myself anymore, it feels like every ones looking at me ive heard people talk about me behind my back and making comments about me I dont want people to think that about me, i have put loads of weight on because i dont do anything or go anyware i am so asshamed of my self over this last couple of years I feel more horible about myself i dont want any one looking at me like this. i dont want to go out any more i have no family to speak of that could help me, My mum passed away when i was 12 after my dad re- marrid he never spoke to me since because i did not get along with her i couldnt accept her taking the place of my mum and he now hasnt spoke to me for over 23 years, all the rest of my family are living abroad, all my grandparents have passed away some of my friends in the past have said theyd help me but have never followed it throo,, my daughter is no help as i are having some problems with her too. i really do not know what to do anymore i hope someone can help me before its too late ! over the last few years ive been to the doctors many times , ive looked up information on line, re, the dentist and nerviousness over the last year and a half ive been backwards and forwards to the doctors and havent got anyware, the first time i saw dr keba i explaind myself my fear, my phobia to him i dont think he understud what i was saying he gave me a sick note for 3 months told me to go and sort it out, the next time i went to the doctors it was doctor keba again i asked him who can i ask for help he said it wasnt his department all he could do was give me the number for the manchester dental hospital, its bad enough just making an appointment at the doctors nevermind ringing the dental hospital he then gave me some meds they were called cipramil and then gave me another sick note for three months, I thought the tablets would help me but they only made me feel worse i was sick several times i felt more depessed than ever before, i didnt feel like doing anything at all to help my self my house went to pot, i just stayed in bed, and did nothing, i felt much worce Meanwhile i wasbn passed from pillar to post from the dss i have applyd for income supp, incapacity benafit allowence & job seekers allowence i have been passed from one department to another,after my sick note had expired i went to the doctors hoping that this time he would understand how far my fear had progressed more so, i got my freind to make me an appointment at the doctors with dr keba, when i got there it wasnt dr keba it was someone elce, i tryed to explain to him that i was realy scared of the dentist but i didnt seem to get through to him he just wrote me the manchester dental hospital, i asked him if he could ring them for me, he said he couldnt do that,he told me just ring them theyle sort u out, he then gave me another sick note…. Icouldnt bring my self to ring them, i tryed but just couldnt. i was sent to manchester medical centre for a medical, they said they would only b asking me questions, so i went, when i got there he asked me loads of questions but n one of the questions really applied to my problem . they said i am not allowed incap because i did not get enough points ( i have enclosed there result ) over the last year i have I have been passed from one department to another by the dss i cant claim income support any more or incap benefit, the dss have said that i can claim job seekers allowance. They say that i am eligible to work,dont get me wronge i am capable to work, i am physically ,but at the moment i can not go out looking the way i do, be lucky if i go out just to the shop, i dont go out and visit my freinds any more Never mind to be in a public place working with people,I donÂ’t go out of the house, i donÂ’t speak to people anymore, i am so ashamed of my self and the way i look, i was told that i should beable to claim to claim job seekers allowance which i told them i couldnt go out to work , it was the only way i can get some money to support myself and my 16 year old daughter and pay my rent when i put a claim for job seekers, i asked if there was any kind of courses that i could do from home as i have a computer and the net at home he said no they don’t have any funding for this, i did look for jobs but i know that i could not be able to face any one looking like this. as appearances count i also sometimes can not speak properly with out any teeth All this is causing me so many problems I don’t know what to do.anymore, I do not know who to turn to to ask for help, I feel if i end it all it would make every ones life that bit easer,,, my rent is not being paid and i have not had any money for weeks and i cant manage any more im in court on the 28th of august they are going to take my house of me the next time i went to th doctors yet again it was a diffrent doctor she told me that i couldnt have any more sick notes because she had recived a email from the medical centre in manchester saying that i wasnt allowed to have any more sick notes Now i cant claim anything from the dss i have no income at all i am not allowed to recive treatments from any ware i cant get any dental plan because i have no money comming in. im stuck and dont know what to do!